Sparkle-cakes and LOLcats

It was a dark, gray, rainy Monday. The kind of day that makes you want to stay in bed a little longer, laze around reading, and generally loaf. It's also the kind of day that sparkle-skinned vampires love. Not that I know any personally. But I hear tales. It's also a good day for seeing a movie with friends. And celebrating birthdays. 

The Trocadero, my favorite venue for ANYTHING in Philadelphia, shows movies on Mondays. It's 3 bucks to get in, but those 3 dollars come back to you in the form of a drink. And they have buckets of PBR and cheap popcorn and other kinds of awesomeness. On this particular Monday, they were showing a certain sequel to a very popular series about vampires. What's that? You're not sure what I'm talking about? Well, I think this will clear it up for you here. A Certain Friend (who shall remain nameless) thought it'd be the best birthday ever to get some ladies together (who shall also remain nameless) and one REALLY good sport of a dude, and go see this movie. With lots of buckets of PBR of course. Other dudes/boyfriends were asked to join, but said they'd "rather be punched in the face" than go. Their loss. 

So in honor of the Pacific-Northwest kind of weather we'll be having this week, and as a special birthday treat for our festivities, I made some vampire cakes. Sparkle-vampire cakes. Vegan red velvet cupcakes. Vegan Cream Cheese frosting. Really silly decorations. 

I started by making a handsome, sparkly-skinned, amber-eyed vampire that would make all the ladies swoon. Then I made a few more, because honestly, there's never enough good men to go around. 

But while I was busy decorating the others, something must have happened. One of the cupcakes got wounded. 

So I looked back over the army of dreamy, gentlemanly bloodsuckers I had created and realized one of them wasn't what he seemed at first. 

You know the only way to kill a vampire cupcake? You have to tear him apart and eat the pieces. It's the ONLY way. 

If I hadn't done it, who knows what could have happened? Vampire cupcakes could have taken over the city! You're welcome, Philadelphia...

I took the rest to the movies, and passed them out to friends. Then we proceeded to laugh for 2+ hours. Well, maybe less laughing and more cackling. And heckling. Lots of heckling. And we weren't the only ones. Have you ever gone to see a movie in Philadelphia? Have you ever gone to see a terrible movie in Philadelphia when everyone knows it's terrible and can heckle the entire time? Best three dollars I EVER SPENT. The cupcakes weren't bad either.